Need sex. Gaining weight.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Drake has all the answers
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize