I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
