I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
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I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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