That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
