I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
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