She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
