I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
