He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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