I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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