I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
