Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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