Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Randomize