Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize