i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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