So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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