I want to stick my p in your. b.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
