you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
