why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
