i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
