no, he came in my armpit
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
