Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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