if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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