Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I pour the whiskey from now on
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
