Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
