Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
As shirtless as possible
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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