she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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