just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
