Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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