And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize