That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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