just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
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