But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize