"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Randomize
