Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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