How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
