i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
