yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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