think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
