I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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