he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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