Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
My ATM looks so different sober.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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