i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Please don't give away my fajitas
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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