I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
