Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize