i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize