Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
