you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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