Where did you get a picture of my penis
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
