So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
