Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
either way he was missing a nipple.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
