It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Randomize
