i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I think I won the penis lottery.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
